5 Things Fake People Do

Here is how to spot inauthentic behavior in yourself and others and what to do about it.

What does it mean to be real?

Well, I can think of a few things being your real, true, authentic self doesn’t mean. For example, being real doesn’t mean:

• Letting everyone see and know everything. You can be a private person and still be real. In fact, part of being true to yourself is knowing where your boundaries lie.
• Refusing to adjust to others. As a human being, you are incredibly complex with a wide range of authentic behaviors and values. You can bend and flex for others and still be you.
• Being ruled by your emotions. Your emotions are real, but they are transitory. Your emotions are yours, but they are not you. Feel them, acknowledge them, and let them come and go. Base your behavior on something more enduring, such as your guiding principles.
• Rejecting change. All living things . You will change. It doesn’t mean you’ve lost yourself.

Truly being real means your whole self is fully present in your interactions (though you may not put it all out on display) without pretense or hiding. It means you live according to your values regardless of audience or situation. You adjust your behavior as appropriate in a way that aligns with who you are.