The #1 Communication Skill for Stressful Situations

It’s hardest to do under stress… and that’s why it makes the biggest impact.

A sharp inhale. A heavy sigh. A deep, relaxed, full breath.

Do you ever consider your breathing? What about when you’re under stress? Breathing just … happens. No thought or intention needed! But though you may not consciously notice these nonverbal cues, your breathing sends a strong signal to others about your stress levels and emotional state.

I’ll never forget the time I was supposed to meet a friend downtown for happy hour. We planned to have drinks and then head to a concert, but she got stuck in traffic. Waiting for her gave me ample time to play on my phone, read and reread the menu, and people-watch. I kept noticing a man a few tables away. Even from a distance, I could tell from his breathing that he was agitated, nervous, and seemed to be gearing up for a desperate move. At one point, I noticed he was gone. My first thought was, “He ran off without paying his bill!” I then noticed he was smoking outside and chided myself, “Why on earth would you leap to such a ridiculous and condemning conclusion!?”

My friend arrived so late we went straight to the concert, but returned for drinks afterward. The same waiter I’d previously had hurried over. “You missed all the excitement!” he told us…