The 5 Laws of Listening

If your listening is effortless, you’re doing it wrong.

You probably take listening for granted. To many, it doesn’t even seem like a skill — it’s something that just happens without even trying: Noises come out of a mouth in recognizable patterns and splash into your ears. But letting words wash over you isn’t active listening. That’s just hearing.

“Active listening” is so called because it takes WORK. Action! It doesn’t come naturally, because you’re more interested in yourself than others. It doesn’t happen passively, because it requires participation. And it’s not easy, or more people would do it.

Listening is an investment of time, energy, and attention, and yet really, it is a gift you give yourself. When you listen, you reap the benefits:

• First, you gain information, insight, and clarity. Every time you listen, you learn. Yeah, you might only learn that your coworker has a concerning obsession for off-brand Skittles… But who knows? Maybe that info will come in handy one day.
• Second, you save time. It seems backwards because listening feels soooo time consuming, but how many miscommunications, mistakes, arguments, wrong turns, delayed projects, etc., etc., etc. in your life could have been avoided if one person (maybe you?) had listened better?
• As a bonus, you gain…